清明回老家扫墓感想
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扫墓记：与泥土下的祖先对谈</p><p>清明时节，我携一束白菊，踏上了通往祖坟的山路。山路蜿蜒，两旁新绿的野草沾着晨露，打湿了我的裤脚。远处，三三两两的扫墓人低头行走，像是被某种无形的线牵引着，向各自祖先的安息之地汇聚。这场景年复一年地上演，而我不过是这漫长仪式中的一个临时演员。</p><p>祖坟坐落在半山腰，几块青石碑在杂草丛中若隐若现。父亲早已在那里等候，手里拿着镰刀，额头渗出细密的汗珠。他见我来了，只是点点头，又继续清理坟头的杂草。我学着他的样子，用镰刀割去那些过于茂盛的植物，却不知为何感到一丝荒谬——我们如此费力地清除这些自然生长的生命，只是为了向不再生长的生命致敬。</p><p>"这是你曾祖父，"父亲指着一块字迹模糊的石碑说，"他去世时我才五岁。"我望着那块被岁月侵蚀的石头，试图想象一个与我血脉相连却从未谋面的人。父亲又从塑料袋里取出几样简单的祭品：几个苹果、一包香烟、一小瓶白酒。他将这些摆放在坟前，点燃三炷香，嘴里念念有词。我站在一旁，像个局外人般观察着这一切，心中涌起一种奇怪的疏离感。</p><p>父亲让我跪下磕头。膝盖接触泥土的瞬间，我突然意识到，在这片土地下，确实躺着我的祖先们——他们的骨骼早已与泥土融为一体，他们的DNA却在我的血液里流淌。这种既抽象又具体的联系令我心头一震。我俯下身去，额头触及潮湿的泥土，仿佛在完成一个跨越时空的触碰仪式。</p><p>"跟老祖宗说说话，"父亲说，"他们听得见。"我张了张嘴，却不知从何说起。与泥土下的祖先对谈，这该是怎样的一场对话？告诉他们家族近况？诉说个人烦恼？还是探讨生死哲学？最终我只是沉默地跪在那里，听着风吹过坟头的草丛发出沙沙声响，像是来自地下的回应。</p><p>父亲开始烧纸钱，黄色的火焰吞噬着一张张印着"天堂银行"字样的冥币。烟雾缭绕中，我想起小时候曾天真地问："老祖宗真的能收到这些钱吗？"父亲当时的回答我已记不清，但此刻看着飞舞的灰烬，我突然明白了这种仪式的本质——它从来不是关于死者能否收到，而是关于生者需要给予。</p><p>扫墓归来的路上，父亲的话比平时多了些。他讲起曾祖父的往事，讲起家族里那些我从未见过的亲戚，讲起这片土地上的陈年旧事。我惊讶地发现，原来这些沉睡在地下的人，依然以某种方式参与着我们的生活。他们的故事成为家族记忆的一部分，他们的选择影响着后代的人生轨迹，他们的基因在我们的身体里表达。死亡并非彻底的终结，而是一种转化——从具体的存在变为抽象的影响，从独立的个体变为绵延的血脉。</p><p>回到家中，我站在镜子前端详自己的面容，试图从中找出祖先的痕迹。我的眼角是否像曾祖母？下巴的线条是否遗传自那位早逝的叔公？这些无法验证的猜想让我感到一种奇妙的连结——我不再是一个孤立的个体，而是一条漫长链条中的一环，连接着过去与未来。</p><p>清明扫墓，表面上是生者对死者的纪念，实则是生者通过死者确认自己的存在。当我们跪在坟前，我们不仅在缅怀那些已经消逝的生命，也在思考自己终将加入他们的行列。这种认知并非令人沮丧，反而赋予了我们某种释然——个体的生命有限，但生命的传承无限；肉体会腐朽，但影响会延续。</p><p>夜深人静时，我翻开家谱，手指抚过那些陌生的名字。他们曾经像我一样呼吸、欢笑、痛苦，然后归于尘土。而现在，轮到我在这漫长故事中写下自己的章节。终有一天，我的名字也会被后人用指尖轻轻掠过，成为他们扫墓时模糊记忆中的一个符号。想到这里，我不再感到恐惧，只有一种平静的接受——这就是生命的自然韵律，如清明的雨，年复一年，滋润着记忆的土壤。</p><p 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